Music to her ears

Sometimes when I document some of what goes on in Skypeland, I am torn about exactly what I should do. Should I give probable internet trolls and/or borderlines a platform and attention, encouraging them to further attacks and disruption? Should I attempt to expose and embarrass them, even though it might be amusing to others?

One character who seems to want to create substantial amounts of disruption is the lovely J. J showed me her picture and appears to be a stunningly attractive woman. However, as J herself has often pointed out, looks are not everything and what is more important is the character of a person. Therefore, by her own standards, I feel that J is a vile ugly person, and more than likely an internet troll and/or someone suffering from borderline personality disorder.

I have a huge amount of material about J that I have not yet revealed. However, a short summary of why I have decided that J is likely to fall in the category of "internet troll" or borderline might be in order:

*J was recruited and introduced to the room by a very prominent internet troll, the "mystery man" A (see the blog post "Mystery man"). A has recruited several other disruptive elements, but then seems to think that if he denies it later, no one will remember. Unfortunately for A, some of us remember.

*J obviously has close personal connections to A, not only because of comments A has made to J in public, but because of A's efforts to defend J, and J's efforts to defend A, as well as by her own admission.

*J was frantic to ingratiate herself with others in a given internet discussion group. J made up pet names for the moderators in the room, and referred to them as "father figures" (it sounded to me like a plea; "Daddy, please love me").

*J liked to whisper "Hitler" and other disturbing things in the room. At first I thought she was just exercising bad taste, but later I came to realize that she is probably rabidly anti-Semitic, like her "boyfriend" and handler A.

*As J brown-nosed and engaged in sycophancy, I was sent numerous messages from several others in Skypeland predicting that J would be nothing but pure trouble, and calling her an obnoxious bitch, and worse. In spite of these very strident warnings from my friends, I decided to give J a chance. I should have listened to the multiple people that warned me about J's extremely bizarre presentation and that made prognostications that J would be a very negative element in Skypeland. I could see the warning signs, but I chose to ignore them, much to my regret.

*J engaged in personal discussions with me and others in text. J asked me several times expressly to not reveal her personal information. I agreed not to, and have not done so to this point. However, since she has betrayed me several times and revealed my personal information repeatedly, I am not so sure that my agreement still holds in this instance. We will see.

*I have all kinds of material that J sent me attacking others in the room, calling other women in the room "sluts", making fun of the mentally disabled, and so on. A large fraction of J's statements reflect extremely negatively on her. I have not yet made this material public, but we will see.

*The situation with J started to unravel when she asked me repeatedly why the tone of a discussion was unpleasant when she entered. I was reluctant to tell her that A had caused chaos, since I knew she was close to him. However, I finally said that A had caused some disruption, and that a lot of people are uncomfortable with him and that I did not trust him. She erupted into a rage. I was a bit disappointed, so I asked her not to contact me further. I did this several times.

*In spite of my requests to J to discontinue any contact, J sent several further combative and accusatory messages to me. I did not respond at the time, exercising self-control.

*J threatened me and accused me of "hitting on her pathetically". Well there are at least two sides to every story. And I have not released my side. Maybe I have too much respect and restraint.

*J pleaded her case frantically with a moderator, as though he was some sort of judge. J seemed to be seeking approval desperately, and then said she had passed our private messages around to a large group. I was a bit taken aback, and said that *I* would publish them myself (obviously on this blog, where I edit them to remove identifying personal information). J challenged me several times to defend myself, which I have not yet done to any substantial extent. Perhaps I should take her up on her challenge. Maybe I am just too chivalrous, however.

* J placed a very select piece of our text messages on a public website, edited to reveal even more personal details than in the original text. J claimed I had told her several times to publish the text messages, although I had made it very clear that I would do it, and never demanded that J publish them. I certainly never asked her to include even more personal details that were not present in any of our text messages.

*I responded, and asked the website owners to remove this material, which was done.

*J passed material to A, who then publicly posted an accusation that I was somehow deficient for not having sex with an underage girl, with her aunt's blessing and encouragement. This story was drawn from private conversations with J, who having released personal information not once, not twice, but three times or more, had now revealed herself to be completely bereft of any decency or worthy of any respect. I had it removed, but knowing a bit more about A than is publicly available, this is completely in keeping with his beliefs and character.

*J announced in a huge fit of pique that someone from Skypeland had telephoned her mother and that she was livid and leaving. It was not clear to anyone how this could have occurred or even if it did happen. I suspect that because this claim was very similar to whining A had previously engaged in, that it was just too much of a coincidence. After all, what is that story about the boy crying wolf?

*While J was absent, I received several reports of rumors and lies about me that J was spreading. I guess J, together with A, was trying frantically to cause chaos, divide people and cause disruption. This of course is standard behavior for both borderlines and internet trolls.

*However, just as her mentor A did, J was soon to return. At first J would leave immediately if I showed up. I made a couple of requests that she at least apologize for posting private information, but I did not expect her to do so, because she is clearly a lowlife and beyond contempt.

*The first time I encountered J in Skypeland after her return, I signalled her in a strident fashion that I was not happy with her behavior. Almost immediately, A came to complain about this. I guess A wanted everyone to feel sorry for J for getting picked on, but really this is just standard trolling behavior, in retrospect.

*The next time I encountered J in Skypeland, she claimed that five separate people had repeatedly appealed to her to drive me out of Skypeland since I was not welcome there and I was unpopular.

*Today I heard that J was crowing about how wonderful it was to annoy me, that it was like "music to her ears". This is also standard trolling behavior; the love to get people upset. They live to get people upset. Clearly there are good reasons that J and A get along and are close associates.

Contrary to J's claims, I often get encouragement from others in Skypeland. Here are two comments I just read today:

I Love Bobs singing

Submitted by FG on Sat, 05/16/2009 - 08:16.

I love B's singing

» FG's blog

i also love bob's singing

Submitted by skypeassholes are not frogs (not verified) on Sat, 05/16/2009 - 09:15.
i also love Bob's singing, he had a good reason to sing , the woman he dedicated those lyrics should learn her lesson ...

I get many other similar messages, from moderators, friends, fans, etc. Of course, this seems to drive the internet trolls and borderlines crazy. Perhaps this is because they want to be the center of attention. Possibly they want to just cause disruption and fights. Maybe they want people to sit quietly so they can lecture and preach all kinds of nonsense to them, without encountering any disagreement.

For the most part, I remain quiet. But if they encourage me enough, I might become slightly less circumspect.

Addendum

I stumbled into a discussion with J and A frantically pleading to a "court" of moderators and other Skypelanders, and making assorted veiled and not so veiled legal threats to the Skypeland forum, to the moderators and several of the participants, including me. A said that any moderation of a forum on the internet made the moderators liable for criminal and civil penalties if they did not moderate it the way one individual wanted (presumably A).

J said that she felt offended that anyone would consider releasing her personal information. Of course, I have not done so. She has done it to me several times herself, but I guess she believes she should be able to do so with impunity, which is the height of hypocrisy. As I said, what is good for the goose is good for the gander.

J repeatedly and sarcastically challenged me to defend myself. I have still not done so, or even started to do so. However, just the suggestion that I might defend myself, as J boldly and obnoxiously challenged me to do in some sort of state of high dudgeon and smug self-satisfaction, has her completely upset.

All it would take for me to back off would be a simple apology for her behavior, which of course J refuses to do. The reason for this is that apologizing, which would be a rational and reasonable act, is the last thing that an internet troll wants; they thrive on conflict and disorder. The fact that J is reluctant to apologize is strong evidence of the mental malady which she suffers from.

To make sure this is completely clear, I again offer J the chance to distance herself from her own past behavior. If she feels that what she did might result in some sort of "blowback", then she should at the very least apologize, instead of escalating the attacks.

But that is not what trolls do. Trolls want a fight. But one should always be careful what one wishes for; they just might get it.

Addendum II

Also, in some other internet forums that I visit, those who make legal threats against the participants and against the forum are immediately banned. This is on advice of a well-known lawyer who specializes in internet issues. A likes to pretend he is well-read on internet law and understands it, although most of what he himself does probably violates assorted internet laws in one venue or another.